Viva Las Vegas!!!!

I love going to Las Vegas. I really do. But I am pretty sure my vacations there are very different that most peoples. You see, I am cheap (out of necessity, not by choice), and I don't like to gamble. I also don't stay up late enough to go to the clubs, and I don't go out to eat very often. You might wonder why I even bother to go then. Well, there is a lot more to Vegas than expensive shows and the 1-800-babes cards that litter every street corner with erotic pictures of women.
There is Vegas the "normal" way and then there is Vegas "my" way. What's my way you might ask? Well, I'll tell you.
First stop is the Gyro place just across from UNLV. They make great gyros for only 5.00...Yummm...Then it's off to Vons (grocery store) on the corner of Tropicana Ave and Maryland for sandwich stuff, chips, and copious amounts of beer (usually Miller Light). It is a million times cheaper to get booze at the store than buy it at the hotel. (I know you get drinks for free when you gamble, but since I don't gamble it gets pricey.) Then it's check in at the hotel, fill the cooler with ice, throw on a swimsuit, grab a book, fill a backpack with beer and head down to the pool. The pools don't "allow" outside alcohol, because they want to rob you blind by charging 7.00 for a Bud Light. I am not a criminal kind of person by nature, and it makes me nervous to sneak contraband to the poolside, but I couldn't afford it otherwise! So like a deviant I shuttle my 97 cent beers in. In one afternoon I can save 70.00 or almost as much as my hotel room costs a night!
I read a lot, I swim, I drink, I listen to music, I get a tan, I drink more, read more, I start to sunburn but don't notice. I make several trips to the restroom and refrain from peeing in the pool like the little boy that I am sure has gone at least once since I arrived. That thought, and the impending heat stroke propels me to head back to the room to make a sandwich and watch TV while laying in bed. I might take a nap. At some point I assess my sunburn and my raccoon eyes tan line from my gigantic sunglasses. Neither is especially pleasing, or attractive.
Then it's a long shower, and time to get dressed up. I bring my nicest dresses, and take my time putting on makeup and accessorizing. Shoes are always a problem because I walk everywhere and heels are tiring and uncomfortable after the first mile. So my shoes usually end up being sandals which don't look as nice, but are waaay more comfy.
The backpack gets filled with beer again, and maybe a bag of chips stuffed in too. Then it's the hike to the Bellagio to spend the evening watching the fountain shows. After 8:00 PM (I think) they run every fifteen minutes. My favorite is Lee Greenwood's "God Bless the USA". I sing along shamelessly. At the top of my lungs sometimes depending on how many beers I have had on the walk over. Once a Korean family recorded me singing the whole thing and applauded afterward. I wonder sometimes about where that video is now. Anyway. In between shows I people watch. This is when I am most grateful I was practical in my choice of shoes. One in ever four girls in heels looks like they want to die. The tell tale signs of aching feet are shuffling pigeon toed, walking on the outside of ones feet, and of course limping. The people watching on the sidewalk in front of the Bellagio is second to none. It literally provides hours of entertainment, and all for free. I see some fantastic fashion "do's" and some even more spectacular fashion "don'ts". I have seen a 3' tall Elvis, a guy in a Jamarcus Russell Raiders jersey (I know, which one seems more rare?), a dude in a dress that I had at home, women in outfits that had way too little fabric thus exposing boobs and butt cheeks, all over the place, (and not in a good way either). Men in every shade of pastel golfing pants, man-pri's, short shorts, carrying accessories like fanny packs, man-bags, satchels, and I have even seen a legitimate purse or two. I have observed husbands and wives in matching cut-off shorts, and American flag jean vests and mullets, and entire families in coordinating ensembles. Oh, yes! Vegas is a cornucopia of fashion extremes and one of my favorite things to do is take it all in. I head back to the hotel around midnight when the fountains stop.
I pretty much avoid the dark and smokey casinos. They are creepy to me, and always remind me of the movie Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (which I didn't like, and BTW I thought the book was worse (an old boyfriend gave it to me for my birthday...we broke up not long after.)) But I can't say that I never gamble. This year I spent a dollar on the penny slot machines. It seems hard to believe, but it took me an hour and twenty minutes to loose it all. I started betting five cents at a time because I was afraid I would be there all night.
I usually wake up pretty early and lay in bed and watch TV (something I never do and it feels so extravagant) until the pool opens, and then...I start all over again! Put on my swimsuit and...well, you know the rest!